Fried rice is a fabulous way to bid random leftovers goodbye, but what do you do when you want the deliciousness of fried rice but have already consumed every wilting cabbage, every softening carrot, every slowly spoiling egg in your refridgerator? Have no fear, Fatman is here to give you a special recipie for making delicious fried rice sans leftovers:
Ramyeon-fried rice!

ramen-fried rice

You’ll need:

a cup or two of cooked rice (as old as possible. If your rice is fresh, stick it in the fridge, uncovered, for a bit to try and replicate that “oh, look, leftover chinese food!” feeling)

a half packet of ramen soup mix

the veggie packet from the ramen mix (if in a seperate package from the soup mix)

a splash of oil

and if you’re so inclined:
wegetables, cheese, sesame oil, eggs, etc . . . all the accoutrements are as welcome here as in any fried rice recipe.

Heat the oil (carefully!) in a frying pan. Add a dash of the seasoning packet to the oil, then dump in the rice. Howl in pain when you’ve splattered the hot, spicy oil all over yourself. Run to the bathroom and run cold water over your burns. Run back to the kitchen when you realize the oil is smoking and your rice is seconds from incineration. Stir, stir, stir like mad until the oil has coated the rice. Sprinkle a little more seasoning into the rice, and keep mixing. This keeps the rice from burning and spreads out the seasoning. Keep tasting to make sure you don’t over-season. Then, just when you think you’ve got it perfect, decide to add just a touch more, sneeze, and spill the entire remaining contents of the spice package into the pan. If the veggies come seperate, put them in a cup and add a little hot water. After about a minute, drain excess water and add them to the pan. Toss the rice around in the pan, trying to be dramatic and cool like the chefs on TV, then spill it all on the burner. Frantically scrape the spilled stuff onto a plate, turn off the gas (you did turn off the gas, didn’t you? OH NO!), and enjoy having combined two of the least healthy Korean foods in existance.

Voila ~ incredibly unhealthy, over-seasoned fried rice. It’s an MSG fiesta for your plate! 맛있게 드세요!